I’m getting one Friday.  It’s a part of the general tune-up I’m getting when the odometer rolls over and shows 50.

You can read about it below the break.  Nothing too yucky, no pictures (now or later).

When I was in at the doctor for my turning-50 checkup, I asked for a prostate exam.  He declined.  “They’ll give you one when you get your colonoscopy.”  Aaaaaah – one of those world-shifting moments.

He continued “Unless you’d like one now, in addition.”  Umm, no, thanks!

They want you completely cleaned out internally before-hand.  I have no doubt that when they shine a light inside me, it will reflect off the inside of the top of my skull.  This is standard procedure, but I had to take a laxative pill last night, and another one tonight.  This afternoon, I drank a 64-ounce bottle of Gatorade.  It was mixed with 14 individual daily doses of powdered laxative.  I drank that in about 45 minutes today.

It worked.

I’m glad I wasn’t in any meetings today, because I wouldn’t have been in meetings today.  If my co-worker would have been at work instead of taking a half-day off, I would have taken the time off.  I went through a whole roll of toilet paper, which usually takes me a week or more.

Tomorrow I go in before lunch, and should be out sometime after lunch.  I’m planning on eating afterwards.  Chipotle, here I come!  I also have a supply of Vitamin M stored up.  Medicinal, you know.  And some movies and a stack of books.

I don’t expect this to be bad.  I will be glad when it’s over.  I asked a couple guys at my church to pray for me, and I trust God through it all.

They warn you not to make any big decisions for 24 hours after the procedure.  I was thinking of blogging during that time, and then reading it afterward to see if it sounds like me.  I think I’ll be eating and sleeping, though.  And I don’t plan to repeat this experiment anytime soon.